Academic cheating and knowing your potential
The purpose of cheating is to acquire personal gain unfairly by taking advantage of a situation. I find the idea of cheating to be intriguing. As I sit and watch a group of high school fresh-man take a test, I wonder the importance of such an act. Somewhere in their lives they feel pressured into believing that the grade instead of the knowledge was more the important.
It’s interesting to me to see the fail in our society when we “test” to measure knowledge when we really should re-examine the idea of knowledge and how it is used. How important is it for an adult to know who won the first civil war in early Roman Empire? Are there better ways to extract what children know verses what they can memorize?
The question of knowledge verses potential has haunted me from an early age. Though I now feel I was an un-diagnosed ADD dyslexic; I was told I am “gifted” I was put on a path of higher learning. “Higher learning” that some how I had the potential to be pushed to the mental limit. However this label as they are now called could have been the stress that drove me to my current form of insanity.
I feel that how you label a child affects their entire life. Sometimes for the better in my case which can drive a student to succeed. Then there are the children that are labeled as problems. They can never achieve a high level of success because they are convinced they can’t. My dad told me the story of how circus elephants are trained. As a very young elephant the trainer will tie it to a heavy object that it cannot move. As it grows it gets strong enough to move this object but is already convinced it can not break free because of it’s early training. I think this is true with children as well.
Now my original question was to answer why some students cheat. To be honest I have cheated. I have painful memories of second grade, which I struggle to recall. I once had a spelling test that I knew I would fail. (I have always despised spelling) So I took my spelling word list carefully placed in my desk drawer and thought I would cleverly open my drawer to reveal the answers. I can’t now remember if I passed that test of got caught. I just remember the reason. I was afraid. I feared a bad grade and then the consequences. I chose to cheat instead of asking for help. At the time I didn’t understand the importance of knowledge verses potential. I didn’t have the knowledge to achieve my potential.
There must be countless reasons why students would cheat, out of fear, out of jealousy, or possibly frustration. For me it wasn’t until I finally realized the excitement and accomplishment experienced after working toward a goal and then completely it that I realized the importance of potential. It is less significant to know everything in the world that it is to have the desire to learn everything in the world.
Aggression and Intimidation
Boys and men are aggressive by nature; it’s the testosterone. They can be very earth. Girls are different they show aggression in a unique way. They stare, they whisper, they spread rumors in order to breakdown their opponent. In terms of Sun-Tzu; they are very water. (like how I’m using my martial arts terminology?)
It is hard for a single individual to stand against a force of people trying to break the your spirit. One needs to be strong in their convictions and create a thick skin that is impenetrable.
In high school I was easily intimidated by other girls, they made me feel weak and worthless. I struggled to make girl-friends. Now I look back and wonder why these girl’s opinions were so important to me, but I also realize that compliance and the ability to “fit in” was a tool I lacked. My whole existence has been focused around being unique. I was born differently and should be proud to stand-out. The ordinary is weak and pathetic. It is an excuse to not think, to go with the flow of the crowd, have decisions made for you; to be told what is correct instead of exploring your own truth. At the same time it is amazing to feel included into a social framework. To know people value your opinion to be trusted and loved; it is a wonderful experience. Individuals must strike a balance between being strong in your convictions and being open to new ideas but also tolerance for those around you.
Though I cannot change my past, I will learn that I am beautiful; I am special and exactly the way I should be. I should forget the ones lost in their own mind-numbing selfish path and focus on creating a meaningful life for myself. I would like to end with this prayer “please help me to access: the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (life, other people), the courage and willingness to change the things I can (me, my own attitudes and behaviors), and the wisdom and clarity to know the difference.”
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Almost 2
I’ve been learning about the word patience. The meaning has taught he that one must have the ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay in order to survive military life. It seems that our entire life is focused around having patience with our future. As many people know the Air Force is in our future, but when is still the main concern. We have dedicated this past year to committing ourselves up to the military and wherever it takes us. It currently controls us without providing its benefits to us. Our experience is where few have traveled and with that few answers to our many questions go answered. I am at lost to describe the emotional state that this patience has caused our family unit. Through the many uncertainties we continue to cherish our moments together and look forward to a time when we will have something else to complain about.
I have been slowly collecting teaching experience through the amazing life of a substitute teacher. Each day brings new adventures and sometimes-intense misery. I will never be able to see substitutes as warm bodies with the purpose of “baby-sitting” a classroom. I have learned that it is one of the most challenging jobs because of how flexible one is required to be. However most days are very enjoyable. I like the variety of schools and classrooms I get to work in. There is never a dull moment in the life of a sub; just last week I taught kindergarten, 2nd and 6th grade and high school math. I determine the job difficulty by my tiredness level at the end of the day. Props to primary grades it is a workout being with 4-8 year olds ALL day!
Now for the not so depressing life of a two year old. Klayton absolutely amazes me each and every day. His word understanding and usage is so neat. He is successfully making a few sentences like “NOOO! That’s mine MOVE!, please.” Now says body parts, like eyes, nose, teeth, elbow, knee and lips when asked what they are. He says Grandma, Poppy, Bubka, and Ciotka but struggles with Klayton and often refers to himself as KeKey (his favorite monkey) We always like to visit with friends, it’s wonderful to see him play with little ones close to his age. He is currently excited about babies and points out any and all babies. One of our friends has a seven month old little girl and when we visit he wants to pick her up and gives her tons of kisses because she’s a baby. His super pickiness is in full-force and I have a difficult time getting him to try things I know he will like. I worry about when this phase will end. He really enjoys playing shinai wacky with daddy and we are on the search for a kid sized one. He is very good at color matching and can say pink, blue, purple, and green. We are trying numbers, but seems to get stuck after the number two. He says one, two, NINE! We are also working on the alphabet, he likes to listen to me sing the song and will say A, B, and C but just wants to listen to me sing it. He is obsessed with the movie Totoro and wants me to sing the opening song (which is in Japanese so I’m not sure I’m singing it properly)
I have been slowly collecting teaching experience through the amazing life of a substitute teacher. Each day brings new adventures and sometimes-intense misery. I will never be able to see substitutes as warm bodies with the purpose of “baby-sitting” a classroom. I have learned that it is one of the most challenging jobs because of how flexible one is required to be. However most days are very enjoyable. I like the variety of schools and classrooms I get to work in. There is never a dull moment in the life of a sub; just last week I taught kindergarten, 2nd and 6th grade and high school math. I determine the job difficulty by my tiredness level at the end of the day. Props to primary grades it is a workout being with 4-8 year olds ALL day!
Now for the not so depressing life of a two year old. Klayton absolutely amazes me each and every day. His word understanding and usage is so neat. He is successfully making a few sentences like “NOOO! That’s mine MOVE!, please.” Now says body parts, like eyes, nose, teeth, elbow, knee and lips when asked what they are. He says Grandma, Poppy, Bubka, and Ciotka but struggles with Klayton and often refers to himself as KeKey (his favorite monkey) We always like to visit with friends, it’s wonderful to see him play with little ones close to his age. He is currently excited about babies and points out any and all babies. One of our friends has a seven month old little girl and when we visit he wants to pick her up and gives her tons of kisses because she’s a baby. His super pickiness is in full-force and I have a difficult time getting him to try things I know he will like. I worry about when this phase will end. He really enjoys playing shinai wacky with daddy and we are on the search for a kid sized one. He is very good at color matching and can say pink, blue, purple, and green. We are trying numbers, but seems to get stuck after the number two. He says one, two, NINE! We are also working on the alphabet, he likes to listen to me sing the song and will say A, B, and C but just wants to listen to me sing it. He is obsessed with the movie Totoro and wants me to sing the opening song (which is in Japanese so I’m not sure I’m singing it properly)
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Top 100
reasons I love Justin
I'll first start off and apologize to those who don’t like all the gushi-ness, stop reading now and this warning is also for the love-intolerant; the following might make those with weak hearts sick.
These are in no particular order and exclude the really graphic mushy stuff
100 He is an amazing writer; he doesn’t really give himself credit but he has a gift
99 He is a grammar stickler….and he HATES text language like LOL, RMOF etc
98 He loves the comic strip “Sin Fest” and that he thinks it’s awesome that the devil girl has a crush on the nerd
97 He is the co-creator of our movie quote game; and a movie genius
96 He loves watching movies almost as much as I do; and also hates so called “Scary” movies ex: Saw, Bloody Valentine
95 He adores our cats; basically the fact that he is a cat person
94 He loves all animals and has the same love and admiration for them that I do
93 He saves me from spiders
92. He loves art; and really enjoys drawing and woodworking
91. Like me he enjoys a good game of Mario Cart or DOA
90. He has never once thought I was strange for wanting to give birth naturally or nurse Klayton.
89. He thinks cloth diapers are cute
88. He doesn’t mind when I fiddle around on my sewing machine
87. He is a math wiz; my own personal human calculator
86. He is a vegetarian
85. He loves the color orange
84. He is a die hard CUBS fan
83. He is the calm one in the relationship
82. He is passionate about Jujitsu
81. He not so secretly LOVES that my dad named a pizza after him
80. He is picky about beer
79. He loves to read and study history
78. He knows everything about Harry Potter
77. He secretly makes Klay watch Star Wars in hopes he will one day say “Let the force be with you, or these aren’t the droids you are looking for.”
76. He looks gorgeous in a suit
75. Like me has a desire to travel to the west coast by train
74. Likes camping
73. He loves that I am his one-match fire starting wonder
72. He too would rather be outdoors surrounded by trees than anywhere else.
71. He drinks tea
70. He peels oranges for me
69. He repeatedly tells me he loves me BECAUSE I’m different
66. He loves being a dad and wants to have two more children
65. He always carries his satchel of stones and a penny I gave him 7 years ago
64. He takes care of the bills
63. He freely gives our son hugs and kisses
62. Loves cake and ice cream for breakfast
61. He prefers the edge pieces of brownies, while saving the middles for me
60. He doesn’t think recycling is strange
59. He loves to run while it's snowing
58. He gives the best smiles; especially while drinking a Route 44 Cherry Limeade
57. He flosses every day
56. He LOVES amusement park rides; especially water slides
55. He doesn’t get annoyed with my NPR obsession
54. He can quote Savage Garden
53. He doesn’t think Michael Franti is too preachy
52. He is a closet communist (well maybe not, but according to the right wing he is)
51. He likes that I get excited about gardening and doesn’t think it’s strange when I say “I have a hard on for plants”
50. He is slightly anal retentive when it comes to the matchiness of his clothes, no blues with jeans, no browns with khakis
49. He genuinely cares about my friends
48. He knows Sunflowers are my favorite; but that I love the smell of lilies
47. He remembers lilies at Nani’s funeral
46. He likens himself to a penguin “wishes he could fly”
45. He is very good at buttering toast
44. He folds clothes so much better than I can
43. He dislikes huge clunky watches and prefers the ones with the visible gears
42. He can do a back hand-spring, and it always makes me smile thinking of the first one he did; just for me
41. He drools over Apple Computers
40. He was (and will be eventually again, hopefully); a wonderful labor coach
39. He loves Dr. Seuss
38. He has blue eyes and for a while blue hair
37. He believes in me and makes me a better person every day.
36. Loves teaching
35. Enjoys going to Chicago as much as I do
34. He operates a motorcycle and is always extremely responsible in regards to safety: helmet, boots, gloves, and jacket.
33. He likes Mojitos
32. He hates sour cream, which means more for me
31. He loves tattoos and has his next two planned
30. He puts up with rubbing my back for hours on end
29. He loves gumball machines……I wonder if Spencer’s still has that one for sale
28. It is not possible for him to lie
27. He collects playing cards
26. He is simple when it comes to ordering at Ritters; chocolate and vanilla with sprinkles
25. His favorite pizza is roasted red peeper and pineapple, with the occasional red pepper flakes
24. He loves to go on bike rides
23. He thinks that I hate that he tries to test the quality of the cheese-sticks by how far the cheese stretches
22. He kisses my forehead when I’m sad
21. My physical deformity never fazed him
20. For a brief time had gauged ear lobes
19. He is extremely against circumcision
18. He prefers clicky top pens
17. He never forgets to kiss me when he leaves
16. He helped me dread my hair
15. He is the over-protective one in our co-parenthood-ness
14. His favorite “holiday” is Halloween
13. He likes it that I hate using strong smelly girly perfumes
12. He thinks blackened tofu is awesome
11. He is strong and assertive in conversations
10. He is an Air Force OTS select.
9. More often he likes animals better than people
8. He is a self-proclaimed mutt
7. He is a very patient and giving lover
6. He reminds me not to chew on my fingers when I’m nervous
5. He thinks I am the most beautiful person in the world
4. He is an amazing, like weak in the knees......fall over, kisser
3. He loves different languages and hopes someday to be fluent in three or more
2. He loves learning to fix things, like plumbing, appliances and electrical stuff
1. He will be smiling once he is finished reading this.
I'll first start off and apologize to those who don’t like all the gushi-ness, stop reading now and this warning is also for the love-intolerant; the following might make those with weak hearts sick.
These are in no particular order and exclude the really graphic mushy stuff
100 He is an amazing writer; he doesn’t really give himself credit but he has a gift
99 He is a grammar stickler….and he HATES text language like LOL, RMOF etc
98 He loves the comic strip “Sin Fest” and that he thinks it’s awesome that the devil girl has a crush on the nerd
97 He is the co-creator of our movie quote game; and a movie genius
96 He loves watching movies almost as much as I do; and also hates so called “Scary” movies ex: Saw, Bloody Valentine
95 He adores our cats; basically the fact that he is a cat person
94 He loves all animals and has the same love and admiration for them that I do
93 He saves me from spiders
92. He loves art; and really enjoys drawing and woodworking
91. Like me he enjoys a good game of Mario Cart or DOA
90. He has never once thought I was strange for wanting to give birth naturally or nurse Klayton.
89. He thinks cloth diapers are cute
88. He doesn’t mind when I fiddle around on my sewing machine
87. He is a math wiz; my own personal human calculator
86. He is a vegetarian
85. He loves the color orange
84. He is a die hard CUBS fan
83. He is the calm one in the relationship
82. He is passionate about Jujitsu
81. He not so secretly LOVES that my dad named a pizza after him
80. He is picky about beer
79. He loves to read and study history
78. He knows everything about Harry Potter
77. He secretly makes Klay watch Star Wars in hopes he will one day say “Let the force be with you, or these aren’t the droids you are looking for.”
76. He looks gorgeous in a suit
75. Like me has a desire to travel to the west coast by train
74. Likes camping
73. He loves that I am his one-match fire starting wonder
72. He too would rather be outdoors surrounded by trees than anywhere else.
71. He drinks tea
70. He peels oranges for me
69. He repeatedly tells me he loves me BECAUSE I’m different
66. He loves being a dad and wants to have two more children
65. He always carries his satchel of stones and a penny I gave him 7 years ago
64. He takes care of the bills
63. He freely gives our son hugs and kisses
62. Loves cake and ice cream for breakfast
61. He prefers the edge pieces of brownies, while saving the middles for me
60. He doesn’t think recycling is strange
59. He loves to run while it's snowing
58. He gives the best smiles; especially while drinking a Route 44 Cherry Limeade
57. He flosses every day
56. He LOVES amusement park rides; especially water slides
55. He doesn’t get annoyed with my NPR obsession
54. He can quote Savage Garden
53. He doesn’t think Michael Franti is too preachy
52. He is a closet communist (well maybe not, but according to the right wing he is)
51. He likes that I get excited about gardening and doesn’t think it’s strange when I say “I have a hard on for plants”
50. He is slightly anal retentive when it comes to the matchiness of his clothes, no blues with jeans, no browns with khakis
49. He genuinely cares about my friends
48. He knows Sunflowers are my favorite; but that I love the smell of lilies
47. He remembers lilies at Nani’s funeral
46. He likens himself to a penguin “wishes he could fly”
45. He is very good at buttering toast
44. He folds clothes so much better than I can
43. He dislikes huge clunky watches and prefers the ones with the visible gears
42. He can do a back hand-spring, and it always makes me smile thinking of the first one he did; just for me
41. He drools over Apple Computers
40. He was (and will be eventually again, hopefully); a wonderful labor coach
39. He loves Dr. Seuss
38. He has blue eyes and for a while blue hair
37. He believes in me and makes me a better person every day.
36. Loves teaching
35. Enjoys going to Chicago as much as I do
34. He operates a motorcycle and is always extremely responsible in regards to safety: helmet, boots, gloves, and jacket.
33. He likes Mojitos
32. He hates sour cream, which means more for me
31. He loves tattoos and has his next two planned
30. He puts up with rubbing my back for hours on end
29. He loves gumball machines……I wonder if Spencer’s still has that one for sale
28. It is not possible for him to lie
27. He collects playing cards
26. He is simple when it comes to ordering at Ritters; chocolate and vanilla with sprinkles
25. His favorite pizza is roasted red peeper and pineapple, with the occasional red pepper flakes
24. He loves to go on bike rides
23. He thinks that I hate that he tries to test the quality of the cheese-sticks by how far the cheese stretches
22. He kisses my forehead when I’m sad
21. My physical deformity never fazed him
20. For a brief time had gauged ear lobes
19. He is extremely against circumcision
18. He prefers clicky top pens
17. He never forgets to kiss me when he leaves
16. He helped me dread my hair
15. He is the over-protective one in our co-parenthood-ness
14. His favorite “holiday” is Halloween
13. He likes it that I hate using strong smelly girly perfumes
12. He thinks blackened tofu is awesome
11. He is strong and assertive in conversations
10. He is an Air Force OTS select.
9. More often he likes animals better than people
8. He is a self-proclaimed mutt
7. He is a very patient and giving lover
6. He reminds me not to chew on my fingers when I’m nervous
5. He thinks I am the most beautiful person in the world
4. He is an amazing, like weak in the knees......fall over, kisser
3. He loves different languages and hopes someday to be fluent in three or more
2. He loves learning to fix things, like plumbing, appliances and electrical stuff
1. He will be smiling once he is finished reading this.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
21.5 Months
It has come to my attention that with matters concerning the military time is very important. Whether it is to turn in a OTS pack or getting finger-printed on a certain day or time; being ON time is necessary. However you can not count on the military to reciprocate. Justin went to his flight physical at the end of July but did not pass the color vision test and is now waiting on a waiver. Our lives have become a waiting game; trying to be patient when all we can is anticipate our future. I feel it is starting to wear on our relationship and my personal feelings of our lives in the Air Force. I need to keep in mind that it will happen, he will go to OTS and until then we should be thankful for the time we have together and with family.
I was not able to return to the one school that I loved and also did not find a replacement art teacher position. Even though most days I feel like a failure; I’m trying to continue to contribute financially by substitute teaching and tutoring in after-care. It has been a difficult adjustment for me and now I realize how fortune I was to have a job that I hated so much. This time last year I had four different jobs and felt overwhelmed; but now it is just the stress of not having a job that is overwhelming.
This past year has been a journey of personal soul-searching. I find that far too often I try to mold my needs and wants into what other people have told me they should be. I deny strong personal desires for fear of rejection and ultimately a part of my soul perish. Though this may sound selfish I need to work on independent thinking and providing my own research into my life. Becoming a mother has changed me; and for the most part for the better but still a part of me yearns to achieve greatness beyond what is expected. Many people don’t have faith in my abilities and struggle to understand my reasons. I don’t think I’m really set-up to make deep intellectual opinions on what I am missing but I will continue to create my own path and strive to find my place in this world one day at a time.
Klayton is a full-fledge 28 lb two year old with all the terrible and wonderful aspects of his age. We think he is extremely smart for an almost two year old. I really need to figure out how to upload video so we can show off his talent. I can’t even begin to list the amazing things he can do but to say the least he is beautiful and I am so proud to be his mommy. His favorite activity will always being reading but recently has became very found of School House Rock, especially Grammar Rock. I too love this adorable animation with its lyrical voice and educational themes. Although watching it several times a day has not helped with my inability to sleep alone on nights Justin is working. I repeatedly wake up to “Mr. Morton is the subject…and what the predicate says…..he does!..” Klayton says a few more words like Tanto, Thank you, Aunt Katie and of course his favorite NOOOOO!!! (at first was very cute because it was such a dramatic NNOOOOO, now not so much.) He is a little bit of a dare-devil, but what two year old isn’t right, he loves to work on his new tumbling techniques. He is starting to jump up and then kick his feet out to land on his butt. He thinks it’s hysterical and it was until he tried it in the nude on the bathroom floor. I think he learned that tumbling naked hurts. He still loves cars and dinosaurs; also likes airplanes and trains. He enjoys drawing circles and trees. We have to continually hide pens and pencils so he doesn’t write on everything. More pictures for your viewing pleasure.
I was not able to return to the one school that I loved and also did not find a replacement art teacher position. Even though most days I feel like a failure; I’m trying to continue to contribute financially by substitute teaching and tutoring in after-care. It has been a difficult adjustment for me and now I realize how fortune I was to have a job that I hated so much. This time last year I had four different jobs and felt overwhelmed; but now it is just the stress of not having a job that is overwhelming.
This past year has been a journey of personal soul-searching. I find that far too often I try to mold my needs and wants into what other people have told me they should be. I deny strong personal desires for fear of rejection and ultimately a part of my soul perish. Though this may sound selfish I need to work on independent thinking and providing my own research into my life. Becoming a mother has changed me; and for the most part for the better but still a part of me yearns to achieve greatness beyond what is expected. Many people don’t have faith in my abilities and struggle to understand my reasons. I don’t think I’m really set-up to make deep intellectual opinions on what I am missing but I will continue to create my own path and strive to find my place in this world one day at a time.
Klayton is a full-fledge 28 lb two year old with all the terrible and wonderful aspects of his age. We think he is extremely smart for an almost two year old. I really need to figure out how to upload video so we can show off his talent. I can’t even begin to list the amazing things he can do but to say the least he is beautiful and I am so proud to be his mommy. His favorite activity will always being reading but recently has became very found of School House Rock, especially Grammar Rock. I too love this adorable animation with its lyrical voice and educational themes. Although watching it several times a day has not helped with my inability to sleep alone on nights Justin is working. I repeatedly wake up to “Mr. Morton is the subject…and what the predicate says…..he does!..” Klayton says a few more words like Tanto, Thank you, Aunt Katie and of course his favorite NOOOOO!!! (at first was very cute because it was such a dramatic NNOOOOO, now not so much.) He is a little bit of a dare-devil, but what two year old isn’t right, he loves to work on his new tumbling techniques. He is starting to jump up and then kick his feet out to land on his butt. He thinks it’s hysterical and it was until he tried it in the nude on the bathroom floor. I think he learned that tumbling naked hurts. He still loves cars and dinosaurs; also likes airplanes and trains. He enjoys drawing circles and trees. We have to continually hide pens and pencils so he doesn’t write on everything. More pictures for your viewing pleasure.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)