21.5 Months

It has come to my attention that with matters concerning the military time is very important. Whether it is to turn in a OTS pack or getting finger-printed on a certain day or time; being ON time is necessary. However you can not count on the military to reciprocate. Justin went to his flight physical at the end of July but did not pass the color vision test and is now waiting on a waiver. Our lives have become a waiting game; trying to be patient when all we can is anticipate our future. I feel it is starting to wear on our relationship and my personal feelings of our lives in the Air Force. I need to keep in mind that it will happen, he will go to OTS and until then we should be thankful for the time we have together and with family.

I was not able to return to the one school that I loved and also did not find a replacement art teacher position. Even though most days I feel like a failure; I’m trying to continue to contribute financially by substitute teaching and tutoring in after-care. It has been a difficult adjustment for me and now I realize how fortune I was to have a job that I hated so much. This time last year I had four different jobs and felt overwhelmed; but now it is just the stress of not having a job that is overwhelming.

This past year has been a journey of personal soul-searching. I find that far too often I try to mold my needs and wants into what other people have told me they should be. I deny strong personal desires for fear of rejection and ultimately a part of my soul perish. Though this may sound selfish I need to work on independent thinking and providing my own research into my life. Becoming a mother has changed me; and for the most part for the better but still a part of me yearns to achieve greatness beyond what is expected. Many people don’t have faith in my abilities and struggle to understand my reasons. I don’t think I’m really set-up to make deep intellectual opinions on what I am missing but I will continue to create my own path and strive to find my place in this world one day at a time.

Klayton is a full-fledge 28 lb two year old with all the terrible and wonderful aspects of his age. We think he is extremely smart for an almost two year old. I really need to figure out how to upload video so we can show off his talent. I can’t even begin to list the amazing things he can do but to say the least he is beautiful and I am so proud to be his mommy. His favorite activity will always being reading but recently has became very found of School House Rock, especially Grammar Rock. I too love this adorable animation with its lyrical voice and educational themes. Although watching it several times a day has not helped with my inability to sleep alone on nights Justin is working. I repeatedly wake up to “Mr. Morton is the subject…and what the predicate says…..he does!..” Klayton says a few more words like Tanto, Thank you, Aunt Katie and of course his favorite NOOOOO!!! (at first was very cute because it was such a dramatic NNOOOOO, now not so much.) He is a little bit of a dare-devil, but what two year old isn’t right, he loves to work on his new tumbling techniques. He is starting to jump up and then kick his feet out to land on his butt. He thinks it’s hysterical and it was until he tried it in the nude on the bathroom floor. I think he learned that tumbling naked hurts. He still loves cars and dinosaurs; also likes airplanes and trains. He enjoys drawing circles and trees. We have to continually hide pens and pencils so he doesn’t write on everything. More pictures for your viewing pleasure.